Monday, May 31, 2010

Bike stream of consciousness

When I'm on my bike the world is mine and I go and go and go and everything wizzes by in a blur of colors and the wind feels warm on my face and my helmet feels tight and makes my hairline sweat and I pump my legs hard to go faster and then I ease up to turn and I signal to the guy in the car that I am turning by lifting my left arm and pointing to the left because that is where I want to go and I make eye contact and he nods and me and I nod at him and he slows to a stop and I speed up and turn left and I give a little wave to let him know my appreciation and he smiles and I smile and I go on down the street which is now a quiet tree-lined one with lots of shade and my sunglasses catch the glint of the sunlight streaming through and I stare to the left and I stare to the right trying to look into everyone's houses because I like imagining what their lives are like and how they live and what they do everyday and I see people stoop-sitting and I see people hosing off the sides of their homes and I see kids laughing and riding tricycles and I see hopscotch and chalk drawings on the sidewalks and I look out for bunnies that run wild in the streets and the occasional squirrel that decides to risk it all and cross my path and I lift my butt up when I hit a speed bump and my bag strapped to the rack makes a loud clanking noise and I worry for one second about breaking a spoke and then my brain moves on to the sound of the breeze in the trees and how green all the plants are and I approach a stop sign and I slow down and try to gesture to the car waiting for me that he can go ahead but he refuses because he thinks I will just blow through the stop like other bikers and I really want him to go first but I don't have time for his wishy-washiness so I just blow through it and prove his theory all along and then I am so close to being home and I realize how very sweaty I am and decide the song on my ipod is all wrong for this moment and I press skip so I can find a good one and then I get stuck at the Belmont and Leavitt stop light like I always do and I finally find a song I like that fits my mood and it's that one by that band that everyone likes and I feel so generic listening to it but there is a reason it is so popular so I let it go and it makes me smile and makes me happy and that is all that matters and work is over and the sun is shining and I am pedaling faster and faster and then I turn right down a one way street to get to my alley but it's only for a little while and when a car comes toward me I feel secretly guilty and wish I had a chance to explain that I usually follow rules but it's just way faster this way and I avoid eye contact and cruise to the alley and turn down it and I watch the squirrels scurry out of the hole bitten through our garbage can and scatter when I stop my bike and I hop off and take off my helmet and let my head breathe and I open the gate and lead my bike into the yard and into the garage and I leave her there to rest until tomorrow morning when I will come again to partake of her kind assistance to get where I want to go once more.

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